Have you spoken to Anna yet? You really should - that's her up there. She's the IKEA chatbot, which means she's not an actual human being but she's been programmed by real humans to deal with all things IKEA you can throw at her.

My good friend Andy's trying to get a new bed from IKEA to his flat, so we've been asking many testing bed-related questions of Anna - titter ye not. But it's when you move the conversation on to other topics that she and her programmers shine. For example:

Ollie: Can you tell us a joke? Anna: I'm an IKEA Online Assistant, not a comedian. If you need information about IKEA I can help you, but I'm afraid I don't know any jokes.

Ollie: Where's the nearest Homebase?
Anna: I can't really say, to be honest. Maybe you should consult a map.

She's also come up with by far the best response I've ever had from any woman:

Anna: As an IKEA Online Assistant I don't know the meaning of 'no'.

Wahey!